Thursday, August 2, 2007

This Just In: The Biggest Areolas Ever

Today at the beach, there was an extremely pale woman several feet to the left of me. She spent hours (HOURS) rubbing oil onto her bosom (something I have not yet witnessed). She definitely has the biggest (AND WHITEST) areolas I have seen thus far. Think whale+oil+specialty porn no one understands and you'll understand what I was going through.

There was also a creepy man who was in his 60s that liked to stand 2 feet away from me and stare at me and Joanna. Joanna looked directly at him a couple times (I was busy reading and utilizing him as a sun-shield) to try to create an awkward situation, but he didn't catch on. How did areola-woman not distract him? This is one of the many life-mysteries I'm trying to solve.

1 comment:

j0clay said...

I think only Paula Abdul can solve mysteries of that magnitude.